Father Flakes Out On Older Daughter's Orchestra Performance He Promised To Attend, Chooses Daddy-Daughter Day With Younger Child Instead
A parent having a favorite child in a family can lead to various negative consequences. Research in American families shows that when favoritism exists, children are more than twice as likely to feel lonely at least once a week during their upbringing.
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This issue can also contribute to strained relationships between siblings, often leading to sibling rivalry. In today's story from the "Am I The A**hole?" (AITA) subreddit, it seems that favoritism is starting to brew in the original poster's family.
The OP's parents are separated, and her dad lives a distance away, which makes their time together even more important. Last week, she had a long-anticipated orchestra concert and had been excitedly talking about it for months.
Her dad initially promised to attend but texted last minute, citing he couldn't make it. This disappointment was compounded when she learned her dad had a daddy-daughter day with her younger sister on the same day as her concert. Feeling hurt and angry, she confronted her dad, who dismissed her feelings as being bratty, causing her to question if she was overreacting.
She then sought advice from a friend who suggested talking to her dad about his behavior. She hasn't told her mom yet, unsure of how she might react.
Then asks the online community if the way she reacted makes her an a-hole.
The OP got upset after her father broke his promise.
And the thing that hurts even more for the OP is that her father used their bonding time for her younger sister, instead.
The OP explains her family situation: her parents are divorced and she has a younger half-sister.
Her dad wasn't able to make it to her event.
The OP eventually found out that her dad went out to bond with her younger sister despite his promise to attend her orchestra.
Another thing that hurts about the situation is that her father dismissed her feelings, telling her that she's getting worked up over nothing.
The OP asked for advice from her friend and from the community.
If other people were in the OP's situation, they'd feel the same way.
The bonding time of the dad with her younger sister could be rescheduled, but the orchestra would continue as planned.
The dad didn't even consider how his absence would affect the OP's performance.
It would've been better if the dad took his younger daughter to the orchestra. It would've been a bonding time among the three of them.
There is no excuse, especially since he promised he would come.
The dad not only belittled the OP's accomplishment, he also ignored her feelings on the matter.
One of the hurtful things that a parent can do to their child is to break promises. It is especially painful to the daughter when her dad purposefully misses a special event where she can showcase her achievement.
It feels like being abandoned and unappreciated, leaving emotional scars that take time to heal. The OP's reaction doesn't make her the a-hole.
It is a natural reaction of any child who feels let down when promises are broken and seeks validation and understanding from their parents.