Young Babysitter Overwhelmed By Employer's Expectations, Feels Pressured To Replace Kids' Mom

"He keeps doing thins like that, offering to pay me double to do it."

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• February 23, 2024

Life today is all about juggling jobs to make ends meet. Babysitting might seem easy, but it can get complicated fast. This story is about a 23-year-old woman who babysits to help pay her rent.

OP works for Andrew, a single dad in his forties who has a busy job and two kids, Amy, 6, and Jason, 10. She's there a lot, picking up from school and staying until Andrew comes home, even on weekends.

Andrew starts asking her to do extra stuff, like taking Jason to his soccer games and Amy to dance classes, and he offers to pay her double. He also tells his kids she'll do these things without asking her first, which makes the kids upset when she doesn’t.

She's tried talking to him about not promising things without her agreement, but he doesn't take her seriously. Eventually, it feels like too much for her, especially when Andrew promises she'll go on a school trip with Amy.

So, she tells him she can't babysit anymore. Andrew gets mad and yells at her over the phone. She talks to a friend about it, and he thinks she should have given some warning first.

When is doing favors too much? Is it okay to say no when things get overwhelming, even if it's a job?

OP babysits regularly for a busy single dad, she cares for his two children on weekdays and weekends, often picking them up from school and staying with them until he returns from work.

Recently, he's been requesting that OP take his son to soccer games and stay to support him, as well as doing the same for his daughter's dance classes.

OP felt overwhelmed by his demands, so she told him she couldn't continue as their babysitter.

OP asked him to stop committing her to things without her consent, but despite her requests, he repeated the behavior.

It's not OP's responsibility how he handles it.

He's using OP as a substitute for himself.

He resorts to money instead of effective parenting and prioritization.

Even with compensation, scheduling without consulting OP is inappropriate.

He overstepped boundaries by volunteering OP for things without consent, despite being told not to.

OP set clear boundaries, but he kept violating them.

He overstepped as her employer, and OP had every right to quit, especially after his misogynistic tirade.

Because he didn't respect OP's professional boundaries, he no longer deserves her services.

Andrew's disregard for the professional boundaries of the babysitter, OP, was not only disrespectful but also crossed the line of acceptable behavior for an employer. By repeatedly volunteering OP for tasks without her consent, despite her clear communication about her limits, Andrew demonstrated a lack of respect for her autonomy.

His reaction to her decision to quit, resorting to anger and misogynistic remarks, further underscores his inability to prioritize her well-being over his convenience. Andrew was using OP as a convenient substitute for his responsibilities as a parent, relying on her to fulfill tasks without considering her own needs or preferences.

In light of this behavior, OP made the right decision to terminate their employment relationship. Andrew's failure to respect boundaries and prioritize effective communication highlights his shortcomings as an employer and a parent, and he no longer deserves the services of someone whom he consistently disregarded and undervalued.

Damjan