28-Year-Old Struggles With Dad's Divorce Secret And Debates Pressuring Him To Tell Her Mom

Divorces, even when they may seem overdue or necessary, often take a considerable toll on families, and the pain is deeply felt by children, regardless of their age. There's a misconception that only young children suffer from the emotional upheaval that divorces cause, but adult children experience their share of pain, confusion, and even guilt.

When children mature, the roles sometimes shift, and parents often lean on them for emotional support. Yet, this newfound responsibility can place adult children in the middle of chaos, causing them to bear an unfair burden.

OP, a 28-year-old woman, finds herself in such a challenging predicament. Her parents have been tethered in an unhappy marriage for two decades, despite being together for 33 years.

Their union was anchored not in mutual happiness but in their religious beliefs that frowned upon divorce. However, the veneer of the strong marital bond shattered when OP's father confided in her about his decision to file for divorce.

His plan was methodical - inform the other siblings first, consult a lawyer, and then break the news to OP's unsuspecting mother. This revelation has been agonizing for OP.

Not only is she grappling with the impending dissolution of her parents' long-standing marriage, but she also finds herself in the unenviable position of bearing a secret from her mother, whom she speaks to daily. The weight of the secret has taken a toll on OP's emotional well-being, causing her sleepless nights and incessant tears.

She contemplates urging her father to come clean to her mother sooner rather than later, primarily to alleviate her own emotional distress. However, she's torn, wondering if it's right for her to interject her personal desires into an already heart-wrenching situation.

At its core, this dilemma underscores the complexities and nuanced challenges adult children face when their parents part ways. While OP's feelings are valid, the question remains: Is it right for her to impose her wishes on an already emotionally charged situation?