Woman Doesn't Let Ex Take Their Older Son To Disney World If He Doesnt Take The Younger Son With Them

"I asked why he didn’t want to take our 7-year-old, and he said because he wouldn’t remember it."

Damjan

• Published in Interesting
• March 1, 2023

Treating kids equally after a divorce is extremely important to ensure that they feel secure, loved, and respected. Divorce can be an incredibly difficult situation for children, and it is essential that they receive equal attention and support from both parents.

Equal treatment sends a powerful message that the parents are still committed to their children’s well-being and that their relationship is still important to them. OP is feeling uneasy about her ex-husband's plans to take their twelve-year-old son to Disney with his girlfriend and send their seven-year-old son to Michigan with his mom to visit her sister.

She let her ex-husband know that while she could not legally stop him from taking one or both kids out of state, she did not feel comfortable with it and asked for 48-hour notice, an itinerary of the trip, and phone numbers. OP also expressed her concerns that the seven-year-old was being left out of trips, such as being excluded from a trip to Lego Land that his older brother took.

Her ex-husband became angry, saying she was making him seem incapable and that his plans for making memories were being restricted. OP attempted to empathize with her ex-husband's disappointment and reiterated that her concerns were not a personal attack on him.

She asked if they were still going on the trip, and her ex-husband said he was, but the kids weren't. OP is unsure if she has done the right thing, feeling bad that her ex-husband is so angry and wondering if this might have caused a line in the sand for the boys being treated differently.

OP asks:

OP is feeling uneasy about her ex-husband's plans to take their twelve-year-old son to Disney with his girlfriend and send their seven-year-old son to Michigan with his mom to visit her sister.

OP continues:

she could not legally stop him from taking one or both kids out of state, she did not feel comfortable with it and asked for 48-hour notice, an itinerary of the trip, and phone numbers.

OP also expressed her concerns that the seven-year-old was being left out of trips, such as being excluded from a trip to Lego Land that his older brother took.

Her views on the matter:

Her husband was angry

OP gave him three choices:

She also posted an edit:

OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a-hole:

A 7-yo will absolutely remember his sibling got to go to Disney, but he didn't.

"Either both go to Disney or neither go"

"If one goes and the other doesn't, that's sure to be a sore point."

"No use spending money on memories if the kid won't remember it" logic

This Redditor shared their experiences:

When kids are treated differently after a divorce, it can create a sense of inequity and resentment. For example, if one parent consistently spends more time with one child than the other, the child who receives less attention may feel neglected and unloved.

This can lead to feelings of low self-esteem and a lack of trust in their parents. Equally, treating kids after divorce also helps to maintain stability in their lives.

By providing equal amounts of time, attention, and resources to each child, parents can help the children to adjust to the changes in their lives. This will help the children to feel secure and accepted in both households.

No matter the circumstances of the divorce, it is important for parents to make sure that their kids are treated fairly and equally. Doing so will help to ensure that the children receive the love, support, and stability that they need during such a difficult time.

Damjan