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Woman Reevaluates Relationship as Boyfriend Reveals That His Dog Will Always Win Over Her

Maryjane
by Maryjane
30 Jul 2023

Animal lovers tend to treat their pets as important members of the family. We share our homes, our meals, and our lives with our pets, and we go to great lengths to ensure their happiness and well-being.

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There is no doubt that pets provide us with companionship, joy, and affection. Only humans can form such strong bonds with members of other species and include them in their families.

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We give cats and dogs human names, purchase toys and other gifts for them, dress them up for special occasions, speak to them as though they were people, and weep when they pass away. 

This is the kind of relationship the OP's boyfriend has with his dog. The OP's boyfriend has been with her for almost two years, but there is an issue—his female dog has always been a little jealous of her presence.

She usually tries to get between them or begs him for attention if he is showing her affection. The OP has tried to win the dog over, but to no avail.

The OP informed her boyfriend about his dog biting her, and he sided with the dog, stating that the OP is still a stranger and does not show the dog enough love to be liked. In fact, he told the OP that the dog would always win over her, which made her worried.

The Headline

The Headline
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940
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The Dog Usually Tries to Get Between the OP and Her Boyfriend

The Dog Usually Tries to Get Between the OP and Her Boyfriend
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940
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She Growls at the OP If She Walks into His Room and She’s Already There

She Growls at the OP If She Walks into His Room and She’s Already There
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

The Complexities of Competing Attachments

This relationship dynamic illustrates the complexities of attachment styles, particularly when a pet is involved. Psychologists like Dr. Sue Johnson emphasize that attachment figures can extend beyond human relationships, with pets often representing a significant source of comfort and emotional support.

Research shows that individuals can develop strong attachment bonds with their pets, which may sometimes compete with human relationships, leading to tensions like those described.

OP Thinks Valuing an Animal Above One's Partner in This Situation Feels Wrong

OP Thinks Valuing an Animal Above One's Partner in This Situation Feels Wrong
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

And the Comments Roll In...

And the Comments Roll In...
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Go Fetch a Better Breed of Boyfriend

Go Fetch a Better Breed of Boyfriend
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Furthermore, the scenario touches on the concept of relational hierarchy. According to attachment theory, individuals often prioritize relationships based on emotional safety and security.

When a partner feels overshadowed by a pet, it can create feelings of inadequacy and conflict, particularly if those feelings remain unaddressed. Recognizing the importance of open dialogue about these feelings can help mitigate misunderstandings.

The Dog May Be Dangerous

The Dog May Be Dangerous
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

The Exit Stage Should Be Used

The Exit Stage Should Be Used
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

He Might Have Treated Other Women the Same Way

He Might Have Treated Other Women the Same Way
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Navigating Emotional Landscapes in Relationships

To address such issues, relationship experts suggest implementing regular check-ins with partners to discuss feelings and needs. A study published in the Journal of Personal Relationships supports the idea that couples who engage in ongoing communication about their emotional needs report higher satisfaction and stability in their relationships.

By creating a space where both partners can express their feelings about attachment and priorities, couples can work towards a more balanced relationship dynamic.

There's a Right Way to Handle This

There's a Right Way to Handle This
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

He Is a Terrible Dog Owner

He Is a Terrible Dog Owner
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

The Dog Will Always Win Over You

The Dog Will Always Win Over You
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Additionally, establishing boundaries regarding time spent with pets versus partners can help clarify each person's expectations. Dr. John Gottman's research indicates that couples who negotiate boundaries around shared responsibilities often experience healthier relationship outcomes.

By discussing how to fairly distribute attention and affection, partners can ensure that neither feels neglected.

Another Word of Warning for the OP

Another Word of Warning for the OP
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

He's Not Doing Anything to Teach Her

He's Not Doing Anything to Teach Her
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

His Pup Should Keep Him Warm

His Pup Should Keep Him Warm
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

This Dog Is Not Trained

This Dog Is Not Trained
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

He's Not Doing Anything to Socialize Her

He's Not Doing Anything to Socialize Her
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

This Is Very Absurd of the OP's Boyfriend

This Is Very Absurd of the OP's Boyfriend
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

This Is an Affirmation That It's the Handler's Fault

This Is an Affirmation That It's the Handler's Fault
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

He Said the OP's Not as Important as the Dog

He Said the OP's Not as Important as the Dog
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

The OP Needs to Find Someone Who Cares About Her

The OP Needs to Find Someone Who Cares About Her
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Important People Take Priority Over Dogs

Important People Take Priority Over Dogs
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Do Not Stay in That Relationship

Do Not Stay in That Relationship
Reddit/ThrowRA-1940

Some Redditors argue that OP's boyfriend is not a bad dog owner because his dog shows aggression toward people that make her uncomfortable. Rather, he is a bad dog owner because he doesn’t see an issue with it and won’t address it.

He won’t even assist the dog or his girlfriend in creating a more harmonious and comfortable relationship, which is a significant problem. Share your thoughts about this story in the comments below.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the inherent challenge of balancing pet ownership with romantic relationships. The emotional attachment to pets can sometimes unintentionally overshadow a partner's needs, leading to feelings of neglect.

Creating space for dialogue about these feelings is crucial in addressing any imbalances and fostering a healthier relationship.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

The complexities of competing attachments illustrate how emotional bonds can shape our relationships. As noted in psychological literature, recognizing and addressing these dynamics is essential for relationship health.

Ultimately, fostering open communication and establishing clear boundaries can enhance understanding and reduce feelings of competition within romantic partnerships.

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