This Mom Went Off At A Stranger Who Told Her To Get Off Her Phone And Pay Attention To Her Kids
One of the worst things is when people try to shame mothers for the way they raise their kids. If they ask for advice, then by all means give it.
But there is nothing worse than complete strangers, who know nothing about a situation coming in to give unsolicited advice that does nothing but make people feel bad—for no real reason. The beauty of the internet is that it has led to a wonderful community of moms who support and uplift each other, rather than judge and shame.
They have rallied behind this woman who was unfairly shame for using her phone. Has anything like this ever happened to you?
The post was originally shared on the Breastfeeding Mama Talk Facebook Page
(Full text below)
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"To the man at Costco today who glanced over at me on my phone while my babies were fussing and felt the need to say, “You see these babies? They fuss like that because they want your attention. Maybe you should get off of your phone and give them your attention.”
First of all, I had no idea the toddler saying, “Mama, pizza, mama, pizza” over and over and the baby making pre-cry warnings to alert me that if we don’t move soon he’s gong to lose it wanted my attention. Thank you for that brilliant analysis of the situation.
Secondly, I had been in the Membership line for 15 minutes already. I pulled out books, snacks, patty cake, and even took to creepily pointing out items in buggies as customers left the store to entertain them.
Thirdly, you had been in the Refunds line next to me for a total of two minutes or else you would have seen the smiles and laughs and interaction.
Lastly, after 15 minutes, these babies got a bit fussy. And on the meltdown scale, they were barely even at a 1. Sensing the meltdown brewing, I took out my phone, downloaded the Costco app and texted my husband to ask what our log in is in an attempt to just get my membership card on my phone. Because I ran out of tricks and my kids ran out of patience and now my goal was to just get us out of this line as quickly as possible before they released the kraken."
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Stop! Giving! Unsolicited! Parenting! Advice!
"But thank you for your parenting advice. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to shame a young mother with two tiny children. Thank you for seeing a stressful moment and deciding, “I think I’ll make this worse for her.”
Everyone, if you see a mother (or father) with young children out in public ANYWHERE, assume she is stressed out. Assume she is trying her damndest to get through the situation. Assume this is the very last place she wants to be. Assume she’d rather be home cuddling, playing, running around with her babies. Assume she probably has had no sleep since her first child was born. Assume she is hungry because her toddler decided he wanted extra eggs this morning so she gave him her breakfast in addition to his own. And if you have nothing kind or supportive to offer her, please mind your own business.
Our babies are healthy, our babies are happy (despite the fact that they are not currently pleased with standing in line at Costco), and our babies are loved fiercely by us. And for the love of God, our babies can wait 2 minutes while we try to solve a problem on your phone."
