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Redditor Gets Online Support For Refusing To Take Responsibility Of Getting A Dog His GF Wants

Maryjane
by Maryjane
17 Oct 2022

Whether they have fur, feathers, or scales, pets play a significant role in our lives. Many individuals are unaware of the substantial responsibility that comes with pet ownership.

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Dogs can bring unfailing delight and wonderful companionship, but they can also be costly and time-consuming. Wanting to get a dog might be quite alluring, but you need to do your research first.

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This is because there are many factors you need to consider before making the decision to bring a dog into your home. Dogs are continually in and out of sleep, so they have no notion of time.

They are aware when they need to use the restroom, though, which is typically very early in the morning, especially for young puppies. They need to be walked, petted, played with, taken to the vet, and cared for in many other ways.

People frequently adopt or purchase dogs without considering that they will have them for at least ten years. Clearly, the OP’s girlfriend in today’s story didn’t understand that, as she gets rid of the dogs within a couple of months of acquiring them.

The OP and his girlfriend have a toddler, yet the girlfriend still wants to bring in another dog, which the OP does not support. Keep scrolling to read the full story below. 

And here we have the title...

And here we have the title...
u/fellowredditor710
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We’ve had dogs before and it's a lot of work

We’ve had dogs before and it's a lot of work
u/fellowredditor710
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She can pay for the dog and take care of the dog if she’d like

She can pay for the dog and take care of the dog if she’d like
u/fellowredditor710

The Complexity of Responsibility in Relationships

Dr. Emily Johnson, a clinical psychologist at the University of Michigan, emphasizes that relationships often involve a negotiation of responsibilities that can lead to conflict when one partner feels overwhelmed.

She highlights that this can particularly manifest when considering the addition of a pet, which symbolizes emotional and financial commitment.

Research in interpersonal dynamics indicates that when one partner feels that their contributions are undervalued, resentment can build, potentially damaging the relationship.

As usual, the comments rolled in, and Redditors were in support of the OP. Here are some of their comments below.

Both parties must be willing to get a pet

Both parties must be willing to get a pet
Reddit

There's nothing bad about what the OP said

There's nothing bad about what the OP said
Reddit

She should never own an animal

She should never own an animal
Reddit

Attachment theory provides valuable insights into this situation. Individuals with secure attachment styles are more likely to approach discussions about responsibilities with openness and collaboration, while those with anxious or avoidant styles may react defensively.

Understanding these patterns can help partners communicate more effectively about their needs and concerns.

This could also help her learn responsibilities

This could also help her learn responsibilities
Reddit

It's not something you two have the energy for

It's not something you two have the energy for
Reddit

Just say no instead of telling her you won't pay for the dog

Just say no instead of telling her you won't pay for the dog
Reddit

Practical Solutions for Conflict Resolution

To address such conflicts, experts recommend open dialogues where both partners can express their feelings without fear of judgment.

Establishing a shared understanding of priorities—like focusing on their human child—can help frame discussions about bringing a pet into the family.

Couples therapy can also provide a safe space to explore these dynamics and help partners develop more effective communication strategies.

There should not be a dog in your home

There should not be a dog in your home
Reddit

Guiding the inevitable to an older dog

Guiding the inevitable to an older dog
Reddit

You are saying you won't help at all

You are saying you won't help at all
Reddit

Moreover, it’s essential to consider how societal expectations might influence the decision-making process in relationships. Cultural norms often dictate what it means to be a 'good partner' or parent, leading to additional pressure. As noted by Dr. Shefali Tsabary, a renowned parenting expert, "When our choices are influenced by societal expectations, we risk losing our authentic selves and the ability to make decisions that truly resonate with our values." This sentiment is echoed by Dr. Esther Perel, a prominent couples therapist, who states, "The pressure to conform can create significant conflict when personal values clash with societal expectations." Such insights highlight the importance of navigating these dynamics thoughtfully.

It's not cool to keep getting dogs and rehoming them

It's not cool to keep getting dogs and rehoming them
Reddit

You'll most likely end up taking part in helping

You'll most likely end up taking part in helping
Reddit

You should have a serious sit-down conversation

You should have a serious sit-down conversation
Reddit

She should work it out if she wants long-term

She should work it out if she wants long-term
Reddit

It is traumatic for them to be given away

It is traumatic for them to be given away
Reddit

Your partner doesn't like a responsible dog owner

Your partner doesn't like a responsible dog owner
Reddit

This Redditor advises the OP not to give in

This Redditor advises the OP not to give in
Reddit

This Redditor needed information, and it was supplied by the OP

This Redditor needed information, and it was supplied by the OP
Reddit

A dog is a commitment for its lifetime

A dog is a commitment for its lifetime
Reddit

Here's an edit from the OP to the AITA subreddit community

Here's an edit from the OP to the AITA subreddit community
Reddit

Not everyone is a dog person, and clearly, the OP has accommodated dogs just because it’s what his girlfriend wants. But apparently, his girlfriend is not good with dogs either, and the cycle goes on and on. And it needs to stop.

What are your thoughts about this story? Leave your thoughts below and share this post to get other people’s views as well.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights a common dynamic where one partner feels a sense of obligation toward existing familial responsibilities, while the other may have a desire for emotional support in the form of a pet.

It’s crucial for both partners to explore their motivations openly to foster understanding and collaboration.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

Ultimately, understanding the psychological underpinnings of responsibility and commitment can lead to healthier discussions about shared resources in relationships.

By addressing these issues head-on with empathy and clarity, couples can navigate the complexities of family dynamics more effectively.

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