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Mom Finally Proves Her Daughter Has Severe Dog Allergies After Years of Being Gaslit, Accused of Hating Dogs, and Losing Custody of Her Daughter

Jesse
by Jesse
16 May 2023

Clare’s mom spent years getting told she was making it up, that her daughter was “just a dog hater,” and that she was the problem. Meanwhile, Clare kept getting sicker, landing in hospital routines and living with the kind of uncertainty that makes you question your own memory.

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This family’s nightmare got even darker when OP’s observations were treated like a threat instead of a clue. OP watched symptoms flare around dogs, and when she finally got Clare tested again, the results were brutally simple: severe dog allergies. But by then, the damage was already done, including accusations so serious that OP lost custody and Clare ended up in foster care.

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Once a dog-free rental home cleared Clare’s symptoms, the whole story turned into a long, painful “we were right all along” moment.

Clare was back to her routine hospital visits until one doctor listened to OP's ideas

Clare was back to her routine hospital visits until one doctor listened to OP's ideas
u/Life-Okra
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Clare was given another allergy test. Lo and behold, Clare is severely allergic to dogs.

Clare was given another allergy test. Lo and behold, Clare is severely allergic to dogs.
u/Life-Okra

All their troubles — Clare ending up in a foster home, years of sickness, and OP being falsely accused of having Munchausen by Proxy, could have been prevented if they had taken OP's observations seriously.

All their troubles — Clare ending up in a foster home, years of sickness, and OP being falsely accused of having Munchausen by Proxy, could have been prevented if they had taken OP's observations seriously.
u/Life-Okra

The story of a mother fighting to prove her daughter's severe dog allergies reveals the deep emotional scars left by years of being dismissed. The relentless gaslighting she endured not only questioned her sanity but also jeopardized her relationship with her daughter, Clare.

This case highlights how such psychological manipulation can distort a child's understanding of reality, eroding their self-worth and trust in those around them. Clare’s ongoing health struggles, compounded by her mother's battles for validation, underscore the profound impact that undermining a parent's perceptions can have on a child's mental health.

The long-term consequences of this situation serve as a stark reminder of the importance of listening to parents and recognizing their concerns, especially when a child's well-being is at stake.

OP’s routine hospital visits were going nowhere until one doctor finally took Clare’s dog-triggered symptoms seriously.

The Effects of Gaslighting on Family Dynamics

This scenario illustrates the damaging effects of gaslighting, particularly in familial relationships.

OP took Clare to a rental home, and within a week in a dog-free environment, all of her symptoms disappeared.

Clare asked if most people were able to breathe that deeply. OP was heartbroken for her daughter, who took her first deep breath at six years old.

They gave up their dog and will soon buy a new home. However, OP wants her husband and their family to apologize to her for calling her crazy all those years and making her feel like she was a dog hater.

OP took Clare to a rental home, and within a week in a dog-free environment, all of her symptoms disappeared.
u/Life-Okra

If your significant other or family thought you capable of doing such a terrible thing to your own child, is an apology years later enough?

If your significant other or family thought you capable of doing such a terrible thing to your own child, is an apology years later enough?
radradraddest

Maybe all the other possible allergens have been eliminated?

Maybe all the other possible allergens have been eliminated?
Koumadin

A study from the Journal of Child Psychology found that children who experience gaslighting often struggle with anxiety and depression later in life.

This highlights the importance of recognizing and validating children's experiences to promote healthy emotional development.

Parents must be aware of their influence on their children's perceptions of reality.

That’s when another allergy test confirmed what OP had been saying for years, severe dog allergies, not a personality issue.

Studies in trauma psychology emphasize the importance of validation and support in healing from gaslighting experiences. Individuals who receive validation from trusted sources are more likely to regain confidence in their perceptions and feelings. Creating a supportive environment can empower victims to reclaim their narrative and rebuild their self-esteem.

This process often requires patience and understanding from family members.

OP's instincts alerted her to Clare potentially having dog allergies

OP's instincts alerted her to Clare potentially having dog allergies
Life-Okra

Someone asked OP what happened to their dog after her suspicions were confirmed

Someone asked OP what happened to their dog after her suspicions were confirmed
Fisceral

Can you really blame a mom who was gaslit for years for not bothering to learn about where the dog was rehomed?

Can you really blame a mom who was gaslit for years for not bothering to learn about where the dog was rehomed?
Life-Okra

Creating a Safe Space for Children

Encouraging children to share their thoughts and emotions can promote resilience and emotional health.

This approach can help counteract any negative effects of past experiences.

Clare’s fight over being dismissed feels similar to a mom choosing three family dogs despite her son’s pet dander allergy.

After OP took Clare into a dog-free rental for a week, the symptoms disappeared fast enough for Clare to take her first deep breath at six.

Building a strong support network is essential for individuals recovering from gaslighting experiences.

A Redditor advised OP to go to a lawyer. They have a good chance of winning a case against the allergist who allegedly falsified the original results.

A Redditor advised OP to go to a lawyer. They have a good chance of winning a case against the allergist who allegedly falsified the original results.
Jpmjpm

Good on OP for not backing down even when her own husband called her crazy and a dog hater

Good on OP for not backing down even when her own husband called her crazy and a dog hater
yoga1313

Why was it so bad for OP to suggest that her daughter could have dog allergies? Medical facts are not changed by people's affinity for animals.

Why was it so bad for OP to suggest that her daughter could have dog allergies? Medical facts are not changed by people's affinity for animals.
justadorkygirl

Therapists advise parents to seek external support if they feel overwhelmed by their child's emotional needs.

Now OP wants her husband and the family to apologize, because years of calling her crazy didn’t just hurt feelings, it cost her custody.

To support individuals recovering from gaslighting, families should prioritize creating safe spaces for open dialogue.

The accusations were so severe that OP actually lost custody of her daughter. How heartbreaking is that?

The accusations were so severe that OP actually lost custody of her daughter. How heartbreaking is that?
NobodyakaGina

Calling OP names and making her question her sanity was counterproductive to finding out what was wrong with Clare's health.

Calling OP names and making her question her sanity was counterproductive to finding out what was wrong with Clare's health.
NobodyakaGina

OP's determination to find out what was wrong with her daughter is admirable.

Reading OP's post was frustrating, especially when people were more concerned about whether OP hates dogs. She spent years being told she was crazy.

Is it so difficult to show her some grace and understand why her focus was solely on her daughter?

The aftermath of the mother's struggle to prove her daughter's severe dog allergies highlights the critical need for understanding and validation in the face of gaslighting. The emotional turmoil experienced by the mother, who faced accusations of hating dogs while desperately seeking answers for her daughter's health, underscores the importance of supportive environments. The community's response on platforms like Reddit illustrates how collective validation can empower individuals who have been undermined in their experiences. This story is a reminder that creating spaces where individuals feel heard can be vital for healing and reclaiming one's identity, particularly in situations where trust in one's perceptions has been stripped away.

The impact of gaslighting on parent-child relationships cannot be overlooked, as evidenced by the struggles faced by the mother in this story. The mother’s journey highlights the detrimental effects of being dismissed and disbelieved in her concerns for her daughter’s health. The narrative underscores that validation and support are imperative for a child’s emotional well-being, particularly when a parent is advocating for their child's needs. In this case, the years of being made to feel crazy not only strained their bond but also led to significant consequences, including custody issues. This serves as a poignant reminder of how essential it is for parents to be heard and believed, especially when advocating for their children's health.

The apology may come late, but Clare’s first real deep breath still proves the family was wrong.

After being accused of faking cat allergies to avoid visits, she escalated fast in the mother-in-law vs. cat-allergy drama.

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