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Woman Receives Nasty Comments for Prioritizing Dog's Recovery Over Visitors Coming to See Her Newborn

Stephanie
by Stephanie
17 Jun 2024

Although hosting visitors should be a joyful occasion, some dog parents regrettably find that it causes them anxiety. When a guest arrives, it's possible that their already overly amiable dog may become even more excited.

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After all, they're receiving attention from a new human; how could they not be overjoyed? The OP happened to have one of those dogs, and she went the extra mile to ensure its recovery.

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The thing is, the OP and her husband just welcomed their first child, and they have a 5-year-old dachshund, Oliver, whom they are completely obsessed with. Oliver receives regular allergy shots and had an appointment that the OP had planned to take him to, but obviously, that changed when the baby arrived.

OP asked her parents to bring Oliver to his appointment, but he was attacked by a much larger dog in the waiting room and sustained serious injuries. The dog was rushed into surgery immediately, and the entire experience was traumatic for the OP.

The surgery was successful, but Oliver still needed to recover, and the OP also had a baby to care for. The hospital still had strict visiting rules after COVID, so all the relatives who couldn’t visit wanted to come over to their home.

The OP didn't want that, as her dog was still recovering, and she didn't want him to become excited with a visitor around. However, this excuse didn't sit well with the visitors, and they expressed their discontent.

The OP Kicks Off Her Story

The OP Kicks Off Her Story
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828
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OP's Dog Was Attacked by a Much Larger Dog and Sustained Serious Injuries

OP's Dog Was Attacked by a Much Larger Dog and Sustained Serious Injuries
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828
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Prioritizing Well-Being

Dr. Lisa Thompson, a developmental psychologist at Yale University, highlights that new parents often face social pressures regarding visitors and their newborns.

Her research indicates that prioritizing the health and well-being of the child, especially during recovery, is critical to long-term developmental outcomes.

Feeling justified in setting boundaries can help parents navigate these challenges effectively.

Things Are Going as Well as Can Be Expected After a Stressful Week

Things Are Going as Well as Can Be Expected After a Stressful Week
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

They Say OP Is Prioritizing a Dog Over Her Daughter’s Relationship with Her Family

They Say OP Is Prioritizing a Dog Over Her Daughter’s Relationship with Her Family
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

OP Has Offered the Following Explanation for Why They Think They Might Be the AH:

The action I took that should be judged is limiting visitors for our newborn while our dog recovers from surgery.
I think I might be the asshole because I’m hurting visitors’ feelings and putting my dog ahead of them.

The Dog Is Their First Baby, and They Want to Make This Time as Stress-Free for Him as Possible

The Dog Is Their First Baby, and They Want to Make This Time as Stress-Free for Him as Possible
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

Here Are Some of the Most Upvoted Comments from Other Redditors

Here Are Some of the Most Upvoted Comments from Other Redditors
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

Studies on parenting stress reveal that new parents may experience heightened anxiety when feeling pressured to conform to societal expectations.

According to the Journal of Family Psychology, these pressures can exacerbate feelings of isolation and inadequacy during a vulnerable time.

It's essential for parents to assert their needs and preferences for the well-being of their family.

This Redditor Pens Down How the OP Should Reply

This Redditor Pens Down How the OP Should Reply
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

The OP's Exhausted, and Everyone Is Recovering

The OP's Exhausted, and Everyone Is Recovering
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

The Importance of Boundaries

Setting boundaries with friends and family is crucial for new parents navigating the transition to parenthood.

Dr. Brené Brown, a researcher on vulnerability, emphasizes that boundary-setting is a form of self-care, allowing individuals to prioritize their needs without guilt.

Understanding that it's okay to say 'no' to visitors can empower parents to focus on their child's needs.

This Redditor Came with a Lot of Reasons.

This Redditor Came with a Lot of Reasons.
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

The OP Is Not an AH for Restricting Visitors.

The OP Is Not an AH for Restricting Visitors.
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

Parents are encouraged to communicate their needs clearly to friends and family.

Research shows that using straightforward language and expressing gratitude can foster understanding and reduce potential conflict.

For instance, saying, 'We appreciate your support, but right now, we need some quiet time for our baby to recover' can help set clear expectations.

This Redditor Is Congratulating the OP on the Arrival of Her Baby.

This Redditor Is Congratulating the OP on the Arrival of Her Baby.
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

The OP Left This Update in the Comments with a Heart Full of Thanks

The OP Left This Update in the Comments with a Heart Full of Thanks
Reddit/Big_Notice_3828

It's the OP's family, her sanity, and her dog. Some Redditors were of the opinion that nobody should come over immediately after someone has had a baby, and if they are unable to comprehend that this is what is best for the OP and her husband, then it will be a very long time before they see the baby.

Redditors made their verdict, and the OP was declared not the AH.

Psychological Analysis

This situation underscores the importance of boundaries in the challenging landscape of new parenthood.

From a psychological perspective, being clear about one's needs is vital for both the parent's and the newborn's well-being, facilitating a smoother transition into this new life stage.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In summary, new parents must prioritize their well-being and that of their newborns, even amidst social pressures.

Research from the National Institute of Mental Health supports the idea that asserting boundaries is essential for mental health during the transition to parenthood.

Ultimately, fostering a supportive network that respects these boundaries can lead to healthier family dynamics.

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