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Frustrated Student Rants Online About Roommate Who Is Obsessed With Her Dog and Won't Leave It Alone Despite All Her Efforts to Keep Her Away

Maryjane
by Maryjane
2 Feb 2024

A lot of individuals get a dog at some point in their lives. Even when others are unable to support you, dogs can, and they provide unwavering affection, comfort, and emotional support, all of which help prevent social isolation.

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The OP of today's story wanted a pet of her own. She has always dreamed of having a Papillon, so she did her research, found a breeder, and met the dog twice before bringing her home.

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OP named her Fu, and she's so glad to have her. The OP enjoys all the responsibilities that come with pet ownership, and she hired a puppy behaviorist or trainer for her dog.

OP has a friend, Ariel, whom she met in her second year of university. They became friends pretty quickly and ended up renting a place with another mutual friend.

Ariel loves animals and is studying to be a vet. They rented a pretty big apartment with a fenced-in yard that allows pets, so naturally, she started bringing home stray animals she finds.

Ariel was mad at the OP for getting a purebred and training her when there were so many animals in shelters that needed forever homes. OP told her that she can't dictate what type of animal she gets or how she spends her money.

Not too long after, Ariel started obsessing over OP's dog to the extent of claiming the dog was hers. It gets even more interesting, and you can read about it below.

OP writes

OP writes
Reddit/roommatehelpp
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There's one dog OP's roommate can't get rid of

There's one dog OP's roommate can't get rid of
Reddit/roommatehelpp
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The problem here is that...

The problem here is that...
Reddit/roommatehelpp

Understanding Roommate Dynamics

This situation highlights the complexities of living with roommates, especially when personal boundaries are not respected. Research indicates that individuals often struggle with boundary setting in shared living situations, leading to conflict and frustration. According to Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a relationship therapist, "Establishing clear boundaries is essential for maintaining healthy relationships, particularly in shared living environments." Furthermore, Dr. Michele Gelfand, a cultural psychologist, notes that "Effective communication about personal space and expectations can significantly reduce misunderstandings and enhance cohabitation experiences."

She's even bought her own carrier for her

She's even bought her own carrier for her
Reddit/roommatehelpp

OP doesn't like it because it upsets the dog's diet

OP doesn't like it because it upsets the dog's diet
Reddit/roommatehelpp

This is a rant, a desperate, desperate rant

This is a rant, a desperate, desperate rant
Reddit/roommatehelpp

The obsession with a pet can sometimes represent a deeper emotional attachment. According to attachment theory, individuals may project their emotional needs onto pets, using them as sources of comfort and security.

When a roommate's attachment to their dog becomes overwhelming, it can trigger feelings of resentment in others who may feel overshadowed or neglected.

OP added this extra info as an edit later on

Yes, I have all the vet/breeder papers; yes, Fu is microchipped. I looked up two 'doggy daycares' that I'll be visiting today, but honestly, everyone is freaking me out, so I've talked to my mom, who agreed to house Fu until January—it's 3 hours away, but that seems the safest option for now.
I tried getting the stoner roommate on my side before talking to the landlord about possibly trying to evict Ariel... if that's even a thing. But really, it just looks like I'm going to have to move, which sucks, but it's necessary.

And the comments from other Redditors roll in...

And the comments from other Redditors roll in...
Reddit/roommatehelpp

Sounds like the friendship is over

Sounds like the friendship is over
Reddit/roommatehelpp

She has betrayed the OP's trust

She has betrayed the OP's trust
Reddit/roommatehelpp

The Impact of Personal Space on Well-Being

Personal space is a critical concept in psychology, impacting emotional well-being and interpersonal relationships. A study from the University of Minnesota found that violations of personal space can lead to heightened stress and anxiety.

In this case, the student's frustration may stem from feeling that her boundaries are not respected, leading to emotional distress.

OP will start looking into a daycare

OP will start looking into a daycare
Reddit/roommatehelpp

Getting a smaller apartment

Getting a smaller apartment
Reddit/roommatehelpp

This Redditor is already sick of her

This Redditor is already sick of her
Reddit/roommatehelpp

To alleviate tension, it’s important for the frustrated student to communicate her feelings directly to her roommate. Research indicates that using 'I' statements can help express feelings without placing blame, fostering a more constructive dialogue.

Additionally, establishing pet-free zones within shared living spaces may help create a balance that respects both personal space and the roommate's attachment to their dog.

Some Redditors say that people who own Instagram-worthy dogs have an obsession and an addiction. Purchasing so many items for OP's pet is inappropriate, and this roommate may only react to public disclosure of the truth if it appears that she uses the dog to further her own public image.

Having said that, the OP was advised to leave because her friend lacks self-control and has the potential to seriously harm the dog.

The Role of Communication in Coexisting

Effective communication is crucial for resolving roommate conflicts. According to Dr. Laura Berman, a renowned sex therapist, "Open and honest conversations about personal boundaries can significantly enhance relationships." Encouraging an open dialogue about the dog's presence and the student's feelings can help establish mutual respect and understanding, as noted by Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a relationship therapist who emphasizes the importance of addressing emotional needs in shared living situations.

Psychological Analysis

The situation reflects common challenges in roommate relationships, especially when one individual's attachment to a pet overshadows the needs of others. Effective communication about personal boundaries is essential to ensure that all roommates feel respected and comfortable in their shared space. By expressing these feelings constructively, it may be possible to establish a better living environment for everyone involved.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

This scenario highlights the importance of clear communication and boundary setting in roommate dynamics, especially when pets are involved.

Research supports that addressing these issues directly can lead to healthier living arrangements and reduced conflict.

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