A Dream Dog Becomes A Dealbreaker In Deciding If A Couple Will Move In Together Or Not
As the idea of moving in together becomes more real, one couple is running into a problem they can’t seem to talk around.
OP is 25 and has been upfront about one thing since the beginning of the relationship. She does not like dogs.
She already lives with two male cats and has never hidden how she feels. To her, dogs smell. They invade personal space. They leave fur everywhere and make a house feel permanently dirty. It’s not a phase or a recent opinion. It’s just how she’s always felt.
Her boyfriend, 26, has known this from the start. He’s fine with the cats and has never complained about them. But he’s also always dreamed of owning a Samoyed. It’s been something he’s talked about for years, long before they discussed sharing a home.
Now that moving in together is on the table, the issue feels harder to ignore.
Her boyfriend thinks it’s unfair. OP gets to live with the animals she’s always wanted, while he feels like he’s being asked to give up something important to him before he’s even had the chance to experience it. From his perspective, it feels like a double standard.
OP sees it differently.
He doesn’t currently own a dog. If he did, she says she would have approached the situation differently. But since this would be a new decision affecting both of them, she feels she has the right to say no. Especially when she’s been honest about her feelings from day one.
Now they’re stuck in an uncomfortable place. One is thinking about compromise. The other is thinking about boundaries.
Scroll through the screenshots below to see how this disagreement turned into a bigger question about fairness and compatibility.
OP and her boyfriend are planning to move in together. The problem is, he wants to get a dog, which she absolutely despises. However, she has two cats, which he’s ok with
Her boyfriend thinks it’s unfair that she gets to be with her cats, but he can’t get a dog for himself
We gathered some interesting comments from the Reddit community
“This relationship won't work, the resentment will build and build that you get to have the pets you want, but he can't.”
“NAH. You’re not an AH for not wanting to live with a dog, but it’s completely valid for him to want a dog.”
“You have a right in a relationship to want or not want certain things including pets. So does he.”
“You are allowed to be a cat person. However, that does not negate his ability to be a dog person.”
“NTA But this is a core incompatibility that does not bode well for the long term.”
“You may have to sit down and have a serious discussion whether you should live together or not.”
“Girl, you posted this on the wrong sub. People here will call you an asshole solely for disliking dogs.”
“Having strongly different preferences about pets is absolutely deal breaker territory, in my opinion.”
“If you two agree on any sort of decision or compromise you will both need to fully feel good about it.”
This situation highlights how future plans can bring long-standing differences into sharp focus.
OP is protecting a boundary she’s been clear about from the start, while her boyfriend is grieving a dream he feels he’s being asked to abandon.
Neither view is rooted in malice, but both come from deeply personal preferences about how they want to live. Sometimes these moments aren’t about winning or losing, but about learning whether two visions of home can actually coexist.
What do you think? Is this a reasonable boundary, or a sign of incompatibility? Share your thoughts in the comments.
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