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Cat Owner Finds Out Her Dad Is Trying To Rehome Her Cat Without Her Knowledge While She Was Away To Visit Her Mom

Jesse
by Jesse
27 Oct 2022

Being lied to is a jolting experience. Realizing that the people you trust can sometimes deceive you will make a person see the world in a different light.

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A more unsettling sensation is being lied to by your own parents. These are the people who shaped our morals and taught us that lying is a bad thing.

Yes, our parents are human beings who make mistakes and poor choices, but it's still hurtful when they lie to us. This young woman's dad betrayed her trust, and what he did belongs in the bad parents' hall of fame.

OP's parents are divorced, and she was visiting her mom's house when she received a message from her dad. He was asking her to send pictures of her cat, Raven.

OP asked him why, but he kept evading her questions. So, she called him, and he had no choice but to reveal why he was asking her to send pictures of Raven.

He told OP he was planning to give Raven away to one of their neighbors. He didn't bother asking for OP's permission.

This news made OP cry because Raven was a childhood pet, but he said she was being dramatic. OP begged him to delete his post about rehoming the cat.

He begrudgingly deleted a few parts of the post where he claimed Raven was his ex-wife's cat that she refused to take when they divorced

He begrudgingly deleted a few parts of the post where he claimed Raven was his ex-wife's cat that she refused to take when they divorced
u/FROGarrow
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He also tried to bribe OP with a gecko before she left for her mom's house, and OP says this is not the first time her dad tried to rehome Raven without her permission

He also tried to bribe OP with a gecko before she left for her mom's house, and OP says this is not the first time her dad tried to rehome Raven without her permission
u/FROGarrow
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OP's mom and brothers are just as mad as she is. Her mom said that she is at least not the kind of parent who breaks her children's hearts by giving away their only childhood pet. Should we even debate who's the a**hole here?

OP's mom and brothers are just as mad as she is. Her mom said that she is at least not the kind of parent who breaks her children's hearts by giving away their only childhood pet. Should we even debate who's the a**hole here?
u/FROGarrow
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Exploring Family Dynamics

The situation surrounding the father's attempts to rehome the cat without the owner's knowledge reflects underlying family dynamics and potential conflict. According to Dr. Janet Lansbury, a parenting expert, "Power struggles often arise in families when emotions are heightened, leading to decisions that may not consider everyone's feelings." The father's actions may stem from unresolved issues with the child's mother, manifesting as an attempt to assert control or exert influence over family decisions. This dynamic can create feelings of betrayal and anger, particularly for the cat owner, who is likely feeling protective of their pet. Understanding these motivations can be essential in addressing the conflict in a constructive manner, as noted by Dr. Lansbury, who emphasizes the importance of open communication in resolving family disputes.

I have no authority over OP, but I, too, give her permission to tell her dad how sh*tty he really is

I have no authority over OP, but I, too, give her permission to tell her dad how sh*tty he really is
LetThemEatHay
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If the story is true, OP's dad is an extremely vengeful person who is using OP and her cat like pawns to get back at his ex

If the story is true, OP's dad is an extremely vengeful person who is using OP and her cat like pawns to get back at his ex
Teahouse_Fox
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Like the comments above stated, it was his way of letting OP's mom know he was giving their old cat away and hurting her in the process

Like the comments above stated, it was his way of letting OP's mom know he was giving their old cat away and hurting her in the process
FROGarrow
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Attachment theory can also help explain the emotional stakes involved in this situation. According to Dr. Mark Johnson, a developmental psychologist, individuals often form strong attachments to their pets, viewing them as family members. This bond can lead to significant distress when those attachments are threatened, as seen in this case where the cat symbolizes stability and affection amidst familial turmoil.

Such situations highlight the need for open communication within families, as discussing feelings and motivations can help alleviate misunderstandings and foster a supportive environment.

Knowing that OP will have to continue living with her dad after what he tried to do with Raven leaves a bad taste in my mouth

Knowing that OP will have to continue living with her dad after what he tried to do with Raven leaves a bad taste in my mouth
chinua333, FROGarrow
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OP and her mom can try looking into free legal assistance to see if her mom can gain custody of her

OP and her mom can try looking into free legal assistance to see if her mom can gain custody of her
Straysmom
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OP's dad is not above "accidentally" losing the cat, given that this is not the first time he tried to give Raven away

OP's dad is not above
cdcme25
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Strategies for Healthy Family Communication

To address the tensions surrounding the cat's potential rehoming, family members should prioritize healthy communication strategies. Research from the National Institute of Health shows that open discussions about feelings and intentions can reduce conflict and promote understanding. The cat owner might benefit from expressing their feelings about the situation directly, using 'I' statements to explain why the cat is important to them.

Additionally, exploring family therapy as a means of working through underlying family dynamics may provide valuable insights and facilitate healthier interactions moving forward.

OP's dad is an awful human being

OP's dad is an awful human being
FROGarrow

At least OP has one good parent she can rely on. Her mom doesn't seem to be the type of parent to give away their child's pet just to hurt her ex-husband.

At least OP has one good parent she can rely on. Her mom doesn't seem to be the type of parent to give away their child's pet just to hurt her ex-husband.
petmomintheBLC

What kind of parent uses their child's pet as a pawn in their sick, sick game? Who would give away a cat to hurt both their child and their ex-spouse?

OP is three years away from legally becoming an adult. She will be counting down the days until she can move out of her dad's home and live a merry life with her beloved cat, Raven.

Psychological Analysis

This situation highlights the intricate dynamics of family relationships and the emotional significance of pets within those relationships. The father's actions may stem from unresolved issues or a desire for control, which can exacerbate tensions. It's crucial for family members to engage in constructive conversations to address underlying feelings and work towards mutual understanding.

Analysis generated by AI

Analysis & Alternative Approaches

In summary, the complexities of family dynamics can significantly impact relationships and decisions regarding pets. According to Dr. Michele Gelfand, cultural psychologist, "Open communication is the cornerstone of resolving conflicts within families." By fostering honest dialogue, families can work towards resolutions that respect individual needs while maintaining harmony, as emphasized by Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, child development expert, who notes, "When family members feel heard, it creates a foundation of trust that is essential for healthy relationships."

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