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Tired Mother Intends To Rehome Dogs Her Family Wants As They Lack Responsibility, She's Left Cleaning Up All Dogs' Messes

Sophia
by Sophia
9 May 2024

A 28-year-old mother says she’s reached her breaking point after her husband and daughter keep bringing up more dogs, then acting shocked when the house turns into a constant cleanup mission. She wasn’t even on board with the extra animals, but she kept getting outvoted, and the mess kept multiplying.

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Here’s the complicated part, the OP refused to take in three additional dogs, yet her family didn’t listen. The dogs are making messes, nobody is helping her clean up, and she’s also stuck dealing with other animals her husband already brought home. To make it worse, the husband won’t train the dogs, so the chaos just keeps rolling, and she’s worried it’s unsafe for the whole family.

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At this point, the only thing left to do is decide whether rehoming is the final line she has to draw.

After being frustrated with the family situation, the OP decided to ask the AITA community this question:

After being frustrated with the family situation, the OP decided to ask the AITA community this question:
Reddit
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The OP already refused to take in the three more dogs, but her husband and daughter didn't listen.

The OP already refused to take in the three more dogs, but her husband and daughter didn't listen.
Reddit

The situation presented here underscores the concept of parental burnout, which involves emotional exhaustion stemming from the chronic stress of parenting.

Research indicates that when one member of the family feels overburdened, as this mother does, it can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration, impacting the entire family dynamic.

The house is just a mess.

The house is just a mess.
Reddit

To make things worse, her family members aren't helping out with keeping the house clean from all the mess the dogs make.

To make things worse, her family members aren't helping out with keeping the house clean from all the mess the dogs make.
Reddit

The moment the OP refused those three more dogs, her husband and daughter basically treated her boundary like it didn’t exist.

This phenomenon often leads to mental health issues, as the individual bearing the weight of caregiving may feel unappreciated and overwhelmed.

The OP has had it and wants to rehome the dogs as her husband and daughter can't take care of them properly.

The OP has had it and wants to rehome the dogs as her husband and daughter can't take care of them properly.
Reddit

The OP even had to take care of the other animals her husband brought home.

The OP even had to take care of the other animals her husband brought home.
Reddit

While the house stayed a mess from the dogs, the OP was the one cleaning up after everyone’s choices.

This is similar to how a man decided to report his mom to animal control to get her dogs taken away.

Identifying Patterns of Avoidance

From a behavioral perspective, the family's reluctance to take on responsibilities may indicate avoidance coping strategies, where individuals divert their attention from stressors rather than confronting them.

The issue here may be that the family feels overwhelmed by the mess and responsibilities, leading to continued avoidance and further exacerbating the mother's burden.

Her husband won't bother training the dogs either. The OP has had enough.

Her husband won't bother training the dogs either. The OP has had enough.
Reddit

The things that the OP describes are forms of neglect.

Keeping the dogs in this state is also unsafe for the health of her family.

The things that the OP describes are forms of neglect.
Reddit

When her husband also wouldn’t train the dogs, the mess stopped being “temporary” and turned into daily life.

Research suggests that creating a structured routine can significantly improve the distribution of responsibilities within a family.

Involving all family members in this process can also enhance their sense of ownership and reduce feelings of resentment.

The constant cleaning also makes their home unsafe because they're breathing in chemicals.

The constant cleaning also makes their home unsafe because they're breathing in chemicals.
Reddit

There is no point in bringing the animals to their home if they're not going to properly take care of them.

There is no point in bringing the animals to their home if they're not going to properly take care of them.
Reddit

That’s when the OP started talking about rehoming, because the family’s neglect was making the home feel unsafe, not just gross.

These dogs deserve a better home. If the OP's husband and daughter insist on keeping the dogs without even bothering to train them, their behavior can only get worse.

The married couple also needs to sit down and have a conversation about how irresponsible it is to take home dogs they can't properly care for. If the husband wanted the dog so much, he should also know that the whole package comes with responsibility.

If the OP's family refuses further, maybe it's time to ask animal rescue for help.

If the OP's family refuses further, maybe it's time to ask animal rescue for help.
Reddit

A Redditor is also suggesting leaving her husband since he doesn't know how to respect her boundaries.

A Redditor is also suggesting leaving her husband since he doesn't know how to respect her boundaries.
Reddit

Implementing Effective Communication Strategies

Encouraging regular family meetings can be an effective way to address responsibilities.

The article highlights how the burden of caring for multiple pets has fallen squarely on her shoulders, illustrating the importance of understanding each family member's role in pet ownership. Without shared accountability, the joyful experience of having pets can quickly turn into an overwhelming challenge, leaving one person to shoulder the entire responsibility.

The OP isn’t trying to win an argument, she’s trying to stop living inside the fallout.

Want more family drama with dogs? Check out how she skipped weekly BBQs because her three active dogs weren’t welcome.

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