Woman Denies Boyfriend High-Maintenance Fish Tank Following His History Of Pet Mistreatment
A 26-year-old woman got tired of watching her boyfriend treat pets like a phase, and this time it was fish. He’d been deep in YouTube videos about tropical fish setups during the pandemic, talking big about a huge living-room tank, like it was a fun new hobby he could half-manage.
The complication is, she’s already seen how this movie ends. Their mini lop rabbit, Tootsie, barely gets cleaned, barely gets attention, and somehow ended up as her responsibility because she couldn’t stand the neglect. Now he insists fish will be different, that he’ll clean everything, and that she’s being unfair, even though he’s ignored her comparisons to what happened with Tootsie.
So she drew a hard line before another animal got stuck in his neglect cycle.
The OP’s boyfriend rarely cleaned the hutch or litter tray and barely interacted with the rabbit at all.
Original Post
So my boyfriend (25M) during the Pandemic went on a deep dive on youtube of fish and takes and set ups and is somewhat obsessed now and wants to get a huge setup for the livingroom of all these tropical fish.I (26F) have outright banned him doing this for the simple fact i've seen this obsession before from him, it's what led to our pet mini lop rabbit Tootsie, and he doesn't clean out her hutch or litter tray at all and barely plays with her, she was his pet but has honestly ended up becoming mine as I couldn't stand to see her neglected.I know he'll end up doing the same with a fish tank and they'll not be cleaned out properly and that is just downright cruel and I am not open to the idea of being the one to do this as i've had fish before and I hate cleaning tanks/filters.He insists that i'm being unfair and that this is different and of course he'd clean them and has ignored me comparing it to Tootsie, I don't want to be unfair to him but I honestly do not see him as a responsible pet owner, should I just see if he'll take care of them and if not give them up?ETA: banning was perhaps the wrong phrasing, I should have said firmly put my foot down.
Here’s how the Reddit community reacted.
NTA.
He shouldn’t be allowed to have another pet.
“A pet is not a toy.”
You can’t ban him from getting one.
Give him some pictures of fish instead.
Same “who gets to decide” tension, like the mom who let her autistic son build his mini animal kingdom, until the stepdaughter cried unfair.
It would be unfair.
“You’re right to put your foot down.”
Make him sign a contract.
It’s what the future holds.
Fish are a lot of hard work.
“He is 26, not 6.”
“Don’t move an inch.”
He’s not responsible enough.
Before he even bought anything, she pointed to Tootsie’s filthy hutch and litter tray as proof he would not suddenly become a responsible fish dad.
The moment he tried to argue “it’s different this time,” she shut it down, because “different” still looked like the same neglect to her.
Tootsie is the real centerpiece here, since she went from his pet to basically OP’s job after he barely interacted with her.
Now OP is standing her ground, trying to decide whether she should test his promises with fish or stop the whole thing before it turns cruel again.
Ultimately, the Redditor said this wasn’t about control, but about preventing another neglected pet. For now, she’s standing her ground and putting responsibility ahead of another obsession.
He might love the idea of fish, but OP is done paying the price for his lack of follow-through.
For another pet-policy blowup, read how she shut down his guinea pig mess in shared living spaces.
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