Woman Denies Boyfriend High-Maintenance Fish Tank Following His History Of Pet Mistreatment
During the pandemic, Reddit user Forsaken-Staff6587’s boyfriend, a 25-year-old YouTube enthusiast, fell headfirst into the world of fish tanks. What started as casual viewing turned into a full-blown obsession with tropical fish and massive living room setups.
According to the Redditor, this sudden passion immediately raised red flags based on past experience. She had seen this pattern before, and it didn’t end well for anyone involved.
That previous obsession resulted in their mini lop rabbit, Tootsie, who was supposed to be his responsibility. Instead, the boyfriend rarely cleaned the hutch or litter tray and barely interacted with the rabbit at all.
Unable to watch the animal be neglected, the OP stepped in and quietly took over Tootsie’s care. While she loves the rabbit, she resents how easily the responsibility shifted onto her.
Now, with talk of a huge aquarium dominating their shared living space, the OP put her foot down. She worried the fish would meet the same fate once the novelty wore off.
The Redditor admitted she has owned fish before and deeply dislikes cleaning tanks and filters. She was firm that she would not take on that work again under any circumstances.
Her boyfriend insisted this situation was completely different and promised he would handle everything himself. He also dismissed comparisons to Tootsie, which only frustrated her further.
While the OP doesn’t want to be unfair, she admitted she doesn’t see him as a responsible pet owner. Letting animals suffer due to neglect feels cruel and unacceptable to her.
She wondered if allowing the tank and waiting for him to fail might be the only way he’d understand. If that happened, she planned to insist the fish be rehomed immediately.
In an edit, the Redditor clarified that “banning” may have been the wrong word. What she really meant was that she firmly set a boundary—and Reddit had thoughts.
The OP’s boyfriend rarely cleaned the hutch or litter tray and barely interacted with the rabbit at all.
Here's the original post by Reddit user 'Forsaken-Staff6587'.
So my boyfriend (25M) during the Pandemic went on a deep dive on youtube of fish and takes and set ups and is somewhat obsessed now and wants to get a huge setup for the livingroom of all these tropical fish.
I (26F) have outright banned him doing this for the simple fact i've seen this obsession before from him, it's what led to our pet mini lop rabbit Tootsie, and he doesn't clean out her hutch or litter tray at all and barely plays with her, she was his pet but has honestly ended up becoming mine as I couldn't stand to see her neglected,
I know he'll end up doing the same with a fish tank and they'll not be cleaned out properly and that is just downright cruel and I am not open to the idea of being the one to do this as i've had fish before and I hate cleaning tanks/filters.
He insists that i'm being unfair and that this is different and of course he'd clean them and has ignored me comparing it to Tootsie, I don't want to be unfair to him but I honestly do not see him as a responsible pet owner, should I just see if he'll take care of them and if not give them up?
ETA: banning was perhaps the wrong phrasing, I should have said firmly put my foot down.
Here’s how the Reddit community reacted.
NTA.
He shouldn’t be allowed to have another pet.
“A pet is not a toy.”
You can’t ban him from getting one.
Give him some pictures of fish instead.
It would be unfair.
“You’re right to put your foot down.”
Make him sign a contract.
It’s what the future holds.
Fish are a lot of hard work.
“He is 26, not 6.”
“Don’t move an inch.”
He’s not responsible enough.
Ultimately, the Redditor said this wasn’t about control, but about preventing another neglected pet. For now, she’s standing her ground and putting responsibility ahead of another obsession.
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